entertainment

19 Massage Therapists Admit the Dirty Details of their Trade

5.

One time, my housemate (who’s a massage therapist too) had a client with a colostomy bag who neglected to tell her and then was too embarrassed to say anything and just lied down on their stomach and the bag burst, and after asking the client why they had a colostomy bag they said “Oh, because I had such a bad case of c.diff my colon ulcerated. I still get flare up of it.”

6.

Biggest pet peeve: bad hygiene. For the love of all things holy, please shower before you get a massage. People who are sweaty and smelly are not fun to massage. It’s gross and disrespectful.

7.

Worst horror story was a guy that came in for massage, holy sh*t the entire clinic reeked of BO when he took off his shirt, very obvious that this guy did not shower or change his clothes often. Worst massage I’ve ever done, I was almost gagging on the smell. And one of his skin things broke off and crumbled in my hand. Hands down worst day of my massage life.

8.

When I first started doing massage about 15 years ago I was working in a fancy spa type setting. I was doing a couples massage along with my coworker. I was massaging the lady and she was massaging the gentleman. Well, unfortunately the gentleman had a Sacajawea coin sized pus filled blister on his back that popped during the massage. Every time my coworker made a pass down his back the blister would glurp a little more of it’s hell juice onto his back. Our clients were both face down so we were making the most wretched faces at each other to express our disgust as my coworker did her best to avoid touching the yellow mess.

Written by Irvi Torremoro

Irvi Torremoro is an Austinite by way of Las Vegas. She's worked in various outlets in food & beverage and is now focused on writing, eating all the things, talking about Beyonce, and petting all the puppies. She runs flavorandbounty.com, a lifestyle blog about people in the service industry.