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The 19 Smoothest Ways To Pickup Someone At A Bar

8.

So there is this beautiful chick, and this dude is trying to talk to her and clearly she is not into it. So my buddy buys two beers and walks right up to her and sits down and says “Hey babe, I got you a beer.” I saw the words come out of his mouth from across the noisy bar…and there was a split second moment of suspense. She immediately grabbed him by the arm and replied “thanks babe”. I was utterly shocked that it worked. First dude promptly bailed and like 20 minutes later my buddy was making out with that chick.

9.

My buddy has a stupid good voice, plays in a Hawaiian Reggae band. In the town we live in EVERYONE knows who he is. He’s a good guy with a ton of personality. One night he finished a set and a girl walked up and said “jeff, how come you never sing me a song?” She asked this because he had dedicated a song to a friend that night. Anyway, his response was to sing her “kiss the girl” from the little mermaid. She melted. After the chorus he leaned in and kissed her…it belonged in Barney Stinson’s Playbook. To this day I am amazed it worked.

10.

When I was shoving beer across this bar a few years back, I had two quite hot girls sitting at my bar. One of them gave me a few looks that were a little beyond “maybe we’ll get some free drinks?”. It wasn’t really crowded, so I overheard a bit of their conversation. The girl who gave me the looks said something like “isn’t really crowded here today, don’t know where this is night is gonna lead to” (having a little trouble translating this shit from german). I looked over to her and said “Well, how would like this to end?”. She looked me straight in the eyes, waited around a second and just said: “simultaneously”

Written by Alex Cogen

Alex is a New Yorker currently living in Austin. She loves cats, grass, and latex but unfortunately is allergic to all 3. She makes mom and dad jokes more than she cares to admit (jk she'll admit it loud and proud). She isn't as funny as she thinks she is. She is the founder of thelazygurl.com.