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21 Cops Reveal The Strangest Reasons They’ve Had To Arrest Someone

10.

“Ohio man arrested for having sex with inflatable raft for third time in three years.” That’s when a mother and her 8-year-old child reported seeing Tobergta naked while “having sexual relations” with a pink rubber pool float.

11.

Wasn’t a cop yet and was unable to arrest because I was laughing too hard. Camp Butmir, Sarajevo, late nineties. I witnessed a local steal a roll of razor wire. He threw it on his back and started to run away. He was only wearing jeans and a thin t-shirt, no protective gear at all. That razor wire is the really evil nightmarish stuff; pretty hard to untangle yourself once your clothes and skin get caught in it. His brave escapade soon devolved into whimpering, blood and little baby steps down the street. He really did get away with it though, before I could wipe the tears of laughter from my eyes he was gone.

12.

In our small town, one man keeps having his house broken into. The burglars eat all the man’s Honey Buns, put a cigarette butt in the toilet, piss on it and leave. They never do anything else. The police have never caught who’s doing it, but it’s been happening every few months for years.

13.

A guy I know is a Washington State Patrol outside of Spokane. Driving down I90 he sees a car driving erratically, feathers coming out of the windows. He pulls this guy over, and the guy is having sex with a Canada goose while driving. Fuck Spokane and everyone in it.

Written by Laura McNairy

Laura is a freelance writer for TFLN. She likes to write about what she knows best — dating, sex, and being awkward, but usually in the opposite order. She is the Assistant Editor and videographer for Peach Fuzz, a sex-positive nudie magazine in ATX.