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WIFE: You promised not to spend the lottery winnings on something stupid
ME: *climbing off my new elephant* He has a name, Karen — Floyd (@dafloydsta) December 16, 2015
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*Wife blows me a kiss from across the room*
*I pretend to catch it* *I walk over to the window and toss it outside* “Grow up Karen” — GoaT FacE (@EndhooS) May 19, 2014