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Men Need To Know These 21 Things Before Losing Their Virginity

Image via Society19
Image via Society19

Although everyone gets super stoked to lose their V Card, it can still be a pretty scary experience. What if I do something wrong? What if my partner doesn’t enjoy it? OMG if I f*ck up, will I ever have sex again?

These are all normal thoughts, and common any time to do something you’ve never done before. But the trickiest part about losing your virginity is the high expectations. A lot of people assume it will be awesome the first time, and get all of their sex tips from pornos.

Seriously, DON’T TAKE SEX ADVICE FROM PORN. That sh*t is not what sex is really like, especially the first time. So dudes, do you want to get some solid advice before porkin’ it for the first time? Look no further. These 21 people will tell you all you need to know before taking your first trip to poundtown.

All men should know these 21 things before losing their virginity:

1.

It’s not porn. Don’t freak out if she doesn’t wail like a dying baboon the moment you even touch her. Unless she asks, don’t try to pound her into oblivion for 3 hours with a change in sex positions every 2 minutes, smack or spit on her vag, or get angry if/when she can’t orgasm.

2.

If you’re bad at dirty talk, there’s no shame in responding with an enthusiastic “uh-huh”. This, brought to you by the guy who responded to “Do you like that p*ssy?” with “Well, I certainly don’t hate it.” Don’t do that.

3.

Trim your damn fingernails.

4.

Rhythm beats speed, intensity defeats power.

Written by Alex Cogen

Alex is a New Yorker currently living in Austin. She loves cats, grass, and latex but unfortunately is allergic to all 3. She makes mom and dad jokes more than she cares to admit (jk she'll admit it loud and proud). She isn't as funny as she thinks she is. She is the founder of thelazygurl.com.