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These People Asked Inappropriate Questions That You’ve Always Wanted To Ask

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They say there are no stupid questions. Well, that may be true, but there are definitely some times when asking certain questions is inappropriate AF and you will definitely be looked at funny or with disgust. Like, maybe you shouldn’t come out and ask the severely obese people at the table next to you how they’re able to have sex. I know you want to know, but come on, man — bad taste.

There’s a fine line that one straddles everyday that hovers somewhere between being a decent human being and being a completely oblivious d*ck. Some days, you’re on the right side of the line; you go about your business, not ruffling any feathers, and understanding important and necessary social cues. On other days, though, you may find yourself wanting to ask if dudes ever tuck their peen between their legs and pretend that there a pretty, pretty princess in front of the mirror. You just never know!

Well, folks — today’s the day that you can take a huge pent up sigh of awkward questioning relief because some lovely people on the internet have answered your very inappropriate questions. And just because you feel entitled and open with no filter on the Internet, does not mean that you can go around asking parents of disabled children if they’re really a blessing because — just f*cking don’t, okay?

Here are the questions (and answers) to all of the inappropriate questions you’ve always been too afraid to ask:


1.

I went from very average at 14 to pretty above average at 18, so teenhood really did it for me. no real change since then though, which isn’t really bad.

2.

Former teller here, Some banks are not allowed to tell you. At mine, procedure was if anyone asked you just say “I’m not sure but I haven’t been.” It’s a security issue. If you say yes they might think they can get away with it, if you say no they might think security is light since it hasn’t happened. Side note though, you go through a LOT of safety training. Recognizing what kind of robbery is happening and therefore how to react. Basics of it are if it’s a lone robber who passes a note, treat it like any other transaction and do as they ask. Look at their faces if they don’t tell you otherwise. If people walk in guns out and halt the bank, step back from your register and look down. These people are hostile, usually wearing masks because they do not want to be seen. Don’t piss them off by looking. That’s what the cameras are for. Training to be a teller was really fascinating security-wise.

3.

Depends on the situation, but could be an assisted living facility, nursing home, or something similar. In cases where the person is disabled enough to not be able to manage for themselves and they have no family or friends helping, a social worker might get involved. Alternatively, they end up homeless.

4.

So here’s the thing, depending on the situation, the penis changes texture. For example, I’ve found that whenever I’m on the treadmill my penis gets really shriveled as the blood gets pumped elsewhere (my legs and such) and so the bouncing doesn’t really happen very much. Also, if it’s cold the penis shrivels as well. I can really only name like a handful of times I’ve noticed it slapping against a thigh, and every time it was very hot outside (like running on the beach).

Written by Laura McNairy

Laura is a freelance writer for TFLN. She likes to write about what she knows best — dating, sex, and being awkward, but usually in the opposite order. She is the Assistant Editor and videographer for Peach Fuzz, a sex-positive nudie magazine in ATX.