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These People Had The Worst Christmas Experiences Ever

9.

Several years ago, I came down with a stomach flu. My family went to my Grandma’s house and left me behind while I spent the entire day spewing various liquids from each end of my body. I became so exhausted from the constant vomiting and diarrhea that I fell exhausted onto the floor of my bathroom in a giant slurry of vomit, shit, and later just water after I ran out of solids. Finally, I ran out of liquids and preceded to dry heave for the next 8 hours. After my family got back, at around 8 PM, I was yelled at for making a mess of the bathroom. Sorry guys, my bad. A really happy holiday.

10.

I got a new razor scooter for Christmas when I was 9. Naturally, I had to try it immediately and was on a foot path down a hill zooming down, I would reach the bottom and run back up. On my third go the scooter betrayed me and skidded a bit and I came crashing off face first into the concrete. My face got shredded, along with my hands and my hip. I could feel all the parents who drove past after getting their kids the same gift watching in horror as I came crying back up the hill to my parents.

11.

After getting kicked out of home I got into a rut of drinking excessively and made my flat mates quite angry. It got to the point that they said they didn’t want me around for Christmas. When my grandmother found out she convinced my stepfather and my mother to let me back for Christmas day. Not only the most awkward Christmas I had but it was the worst because I was left out of every photo, ignored by nearly everyone apart from my siblings and whenever my family did look at me it was with a look of disgust.

12.

The year the cat ran up the tree and couldn’t get down. The dog thought it was play time and ran full speed across my living room and launched into the tree to “play with the cat.” I have an English Mastiff that weighs about 150 lbs right now. The tree stood no chance. Ornaments…ornaments everywhere. The cat bolted as soon as the tree hit the ground and the dog followed. There were crushed presents, shattered ornaments, and pine needles everywhere. That was the last year we had a real tree. Bought a fake, fold out one next year so the cat no longer sniffed around and climbed into it. It didn’t really ruin Christmas but it definitely wasn’t a good way to spend Christmas morning.

Written by Laura McNairy

Laura is a freelance writer for TFLN. She likes to write about what she knows best — dating, sex, and being awkward, but usually in the opposite order. She is the Assistant Editor and videographer for Peach Fuzz, a sex-positive nudie magazine in ATX.