61.
me seamlessly transitioning between calm and panicked throughout the day pic.twitter.com/Qh9qQ6sJai
— yall seen that movie about the rat that can cook? (@deadliidev) May 6, 2018
62.
“what’s your WiFi password”
“It’s on the back of the router”
Router: https://t.co/6adCjXpMgm
— ᴠɪᴄᴋ ᴍᴏɴᴛᴏʏᴀ (@vickmontoyaa) September 16, 2018
63.
[holding my new born son]
me: he’s beautiful
doctor: we’re gonna have to give him some shots
me: oh hell yeah pour up it’s his fucking birthday
— cory (@_coryrichardson) July 24, 2018
64.
I LIVE WITH A TINY PREDATOR (sorry for my shriek) pic.twitter.com/nOjzbH5Pwf
— Summer (@summer95) October 11, 2018
65.
“I’ll see” = I’m not coming, never was coming, never considered it, never gave it a second thought, only remembered because you asked again
— anthony (@xforcades2) October 12, 2018
66.
Daughter: What does gays mean?
Me: Well you know mum and dad love each other – two men can love each other the same way
Her: So what's 'penetrating gays'?
Me: Er… read me the whole sentence
Her: "She stared at him with a penetrating gaze"
Me: Oh— Ayn Randy (@ItsAndyRyan) September 11, 2018
67.
when you step on your dogs paw and they make that little “aarf” sound pic.twitter.com/Ru4IqWCIt8
— MEECH (@_michicuervo) April 6, 2018
68.
the internet made me do this pic.twitter.com/qlbFr7rmRU
— Elliott (@jelacour) October 13, 2018
69.
Did I break out bc I wore makeup or because I used a new makeup remover or because I’m gonna be on my period in a week or bc I’ve been eating or bc I’m sad or bc I’m stressed ? Which is it
— festive sigh ? (@mikiwimango) October 24, 2018
70.
you: weird flex but ok
an intellectual: odd gloat but understandable nonetheless
me, a genius: peculiar boast but alas
— A.c (@ilysmooky) November 1, 2018