13.
every drink i make is a handcrafted beverage made with care and craft pic.twitter.com/zw51LcYJmb
— krstl (@jynxremoving) October 15, 2018
14.
boss: you failed your drug test
me: there were poppyseeds on my bagel
boss: so what about the weed and amphetamines
me:
boss:
me: it was an everything bagel
— ? ? ? ? ? ? ॐ (@jcolllis) October 12, 2018
15.
Sunny D tastes like someone made a bet that they could make orange juice without oranges.
— TrapMoneyYene ?? (@AkanButNoJeezyy) November 14, 2018
16.
Family @ thanksgiving: So. Still no ring on your finger huh?
Me, smoking a piece of asparagus and swirling a wine glass of whiskey: I believe in catch and release dating. More humane.
— ditch pony (@molly7anne) November 8, 2018
17.
I’ll just leave this here. pic.twitter.com/JLaTCRT9Af
— JustJude (@judebax) November 14, 2018
18.
I respect my dog for eating every meal of her life lying down on the floor with her head in the food bowl pic.twitter.com/DYrV8M7soq
— Jia Tolentino (@jiatolentino) November 11, 2018
19.
the disrespect … No onions? No cilantro? No salsa verde? Throw the whole plate away. https://t.co/C6jX5NZ3ij
— DB (@FreeTrendy_) November 8, 2018
20.
Lmfao why did he bite it before? ? pic.twitter.com/yaecVhAXUx
— Male Thoughts (@TheComedyHumor) November 14, 2018
21.
Someone posted this to our neighborhood message board and I will never recover. pic.twitter.com/1uWwOKHHsZ
— Hannah Solow (@hamstertalk) November 8, 2018
22.
When the yams touch the Mac & cheese https://t.co/HqxFgg4Q0X
— Thanksgiving Enthusiast (@Afterparty_E) November 15, 2018
23.
i wouldn’t even cook crack in here https://t.co/oqNGyYg2do
— The First To Say “First To Say” (@Sergeveli13) November 13, 2018
24.
Lmao nobody can say they knew this pic.twitter.com/oZRIrgfo32
— #GBTG (@ShowOut45) November 11, 2018
25.
Lmao nobody can say they knew this pic.twitter.com/F0CEQPWz5p
— Michael (@mbdalton) November 14, 2018
26.
Don’t ever let a recipe tell you how much garlic to put in. You measure that with your heart.
— ?????? (@Jelly_Ehles) November 16, 2018
27.
My fatass was drunk last night and had a photo shoot with my McDonald’s hashbrown at 4AM pic.twitter.com/8iz80eXsEY
— Faustino Limon Jr (@FLJBieber) November 17, 2018