19.
motherhood be like: pic.twitter.com/eo8TsKDSDD
— eatwords drinkstars (@akamami) January 30, 2018
18.
Parenthood is full of surprises. Fix your child's favorite breakfast, yogurt with peaches, and SURPRISE! They now hate yogurt. And peaches.
— MyMomologue (@MyMomologue) June 22, 2017
17.
Hell hath no fury like a 4 year old whose sandwich has been cut into squares when he wanted triangles.
— Lurkin' Mom (@LurkAtHomeMom) June 23, 2014
16.
Me at 8am: "Oh, juice spill? That's ok, kids. Love you."
Me at 5pm: "If ONE MORE GODDAMN DROP OF JUICE spills, I'm burning the house down!"
— Stephanie Ortiz (@Six_Pack_Mom) April 22, 2017
15.
I'm at my most hostage negotiator when I see my 3 year old holding a permanent marker without the lid.
— Simon Holland (@simoncholland) September 21, 2014
14.
Most of my time as a mother has been spent in a closet, eating something I didn't want to share.
— Sarcastic Mommy (@sarcasticmommy4) February 3, 2015
13.
Watching "Frozen" again with my daughter because we paid $19.99 to download it so she's going to fucking watch it every day until college.
— Michael Ian Black (@michaelianblack) March 9, 2014
12.
My son's superpower is to turn 1 cracker into 10 lbs of crumbs
— Robert Knop (@FatherWithTwins) August 9, 2013
11.
Asked to switch seats on the plane because I was sitting next to a crying baby. Apparently, that's not allowed if the baby is yours.
— Ilana Wiles (@mommyshorts) February 12, 2014
10.
I just found spaghetti in our heating ducts if any of you were thinking of having children.
— Rodney Lacroix (@moooooog35) December 28, 2015