entertainment

The 25 Worst Things That Have Been Inside People’s Bodies

6.

Salmonella. Took a very painful 6 days to get out, from both ends. My butthole hasn’t been the same since.

7.

My daughter got her vitamin tablet stuck up her nose. She was just a toddler. She used to take it with her bedtime milk. I went in to read to her and asked if she’d taken it. She just looked apprehensively at me and so I asked where it was. “Up my nose”. So I took her to A&E because all the books said not to try to get something out yourself. It was a busy night in A&E. At the exact moment the doctor came out and called us she sneezed and it shot across the waiting area. It was actually really funny because everyone knew why she was there. Also they got to be seen quicker.

8.

Accidentally poked a pencil on my fingertip as a kid. 15 years later there’s still a black dot underneath my finger skin.

9.

Dad was tickling me outside our car when I was a kid. We were leaving the movies (Follow That Bird actually) and I was super happy. I was tickled so much and so giddy I fell and scraped my knee on a car next to us. I had huge chunks of rust embedded in my knee. Took a while to get home, sterilize and extract on the kitchen table.

10.

Kidney stone. Never again (hopefully).

Written by Alex Cogen

Alex is a New Yorker currently living in Austin. She loves cats, grass, and latex but unfortunately is allergic to all 3. She makes mom and dad jokes more than she cares to admit (jk she'll admit it loud and proud). She isn't as funny as she thinks she is. She is the founder of thelazygurl.com.