27 Embarrassing Sexual Things Children Had to Explain to Their Parents

Image via Giphy
Image via Giphy

As we grow up, we learn a lot about human nature. For instance, how human beings like to hump things and enjoying watching naked people. It happens eventually! You gotta see it cuming (lol).

But what you don’t anticipate? Having to explain your sexual desires or knowledge to other people. And not just any old person: your parents. You’d think that by now they’d know whats up, but apparently that’s not the case.

You see, even when they find nudes under your bed or a poster of Zac Efron shirtless on the cover of GQ (sorry mom) they STILL want to know why you have them. UHHHH YOU KNOW WHY BISH. And then, after that awful humiliation, you get older, and they start coming to YOU for sexual knowledge. They want to know what fapping, fisting, and jizz are. But instead of trusting the dear ole internet, they ask you, their loving, obliging child.

Props to those that can find humor in those situations, but some of us be like YIKES GET ME DA FUQ OUTTA HERE. So take pleasure in the pain of these 27 children. They had to explain to dear old mom and dad why they need to visit the doctor for their penile issues, or tell them what exactly bukake is. LOL sucks to be them.

These 27 children had to explain embarrassing sexual things to their parents:


1.

I had to explain to my mom who works in education with parents and administrators and her ER Surgeon Fiancée that “Netflix and Chill” doesn’t actually mean watching Netflix and hanging out. I found out She and her fiancee had been going around for 6 months telling people they were “Netflix and chilling” she then understood why they had both gotten such odd looks and reactions.

2.

Bukake. During a game of cards against humanity.

3.

“What are these?” To the sex toys kept not hidden well enough. But to be fair I didn’t expect my room to be raided like that so…

4.

That a booty call is not the same as a butt dial and no, you can’t use them interchangeably, dad.

Written by Alex Cogen

Alex is a New Yorker currently living in Austin. She loves cats, grass, and latex but unfortunately is allergic to all 3. She makes mom and dad jokes more than she cares to admit (jk she'll admit it loud and proud). She isn't as funny as she thinks she is. She is the founder of thelazygurl.com.