27 Problem Children Ruined Ridiculously Expensive Things

by Alex Cogen

10.

My brother ripped earrings out of both my mother’s ears when he was a baby. He did one, then the other a few days later. I guess the cosmetic surgery to fix it was expensive and insurance didn’t cover it. Don’t wear big earrings when you’re holding a baby, ladies.

11.

My kid broke my TV last week, and I’m currently searching for my Fitbit that he’s hidden. He took it from the charger while I had the balls to cook him breakfast.

12.

Our brand new flat screen TV. He was two and threw his toy truck at it…obliterated. Never wanted to disown him more than in that moment.

13.

My dad ordered a brand new, beautiful cherry wood kitchen table set. On the day it was delivered, my sister walked up to it and bit the wood. Parents still have the table, table still has little kid bite marks.

14.

My sister destroyed not one, but two blenders by leaving a spoon in them before turning them on. The explosions were impressive.

Written by Alex Cogen

Alex is a New Yorker currently living in Austin. She loves cats, grass, and latex but unfortunately is allergic to all 3. She makes mom and dad jokes more than she cares to admit (jk she'll admit it loud and proud). She isn't as funny as she thinks she is. She is the founder of thelazygurl.com.