13.
Expectation:
You travel to a different beach every weekend and lay out to achieve that perfect gold brown tan. Families play by the boardwalk while hot men flex their muscles on outdoor obstacle courses.
Reality:
You spend an hour in traffic driving to the beach, pay $15 for a parking spot, and walk another 20 minutes before reaching sand. It’s another crowded Saturday, so you stretch your beach towel out between a couple making out and a family with three young, bratty kids. Other patrons kick sand in your face as they pass by. The sun is out, but it’s effing freezing, and for the love of god I will shake your toddler if he does not stop crying.
14.
Expectation:
You send your script into a Very Important Production Company and mention in your email that you went to the same college that their Very Important Producer did. You hear back in a matter of days from the producer herself that she liked your pitch, but it didn’t fit the company, though she’d love to stay in contact with you should she need someone to work on her next project!
Reality:
Your script is automatically tossed out upon receipt and never sees the light of day. OR it’s forwarded to an intern who reads it and deems it terrible, and THEN it winds up in the trash bin.
15.
Expectation:
There are so many museums, shows, and concerts to go see – it’s freaking Hollywood! You can’t wait to show up to the Hollywood Bowl to watch Rebel Wilson play Ursula in the production of The Little Mermaid.
Reality:
LOL you have absolutely no money to go out or buy show tickets, because you spent all your earnings from your sad production assistant job on rent and gas money. Time to hit up the 7-11 for a personal pizza and Netflix the night away!
