lifestyle

What It’s Like To Cut A Family Member Out of Your Life

11.

It’s been almost two years since I cut off contact with my family and I feel as though I can’t live a normal life at the moment. Constant nightmares and guilt. Family members telling me I should at least tell them I’m alive even though deep down I don’t owe them anything. It’s the negative stigma associated with the phrase, “Oh, I don’t talk to my family anymore.” And some people take offense to it. For example, “They’ve done everything for you! How could you do that to them?” I care too much about what people think. The people-pleasing habit I’ve obtained through years of abuse has twisted and desecrated any sort of personality I developed throughout my childhood. I’ve just started learning how to be an actual person.

12.

I had people in my life that weren’t family come over and confront me, tell me I had to fix things with my toxic step-mom and father, even give me an ultimatum. It just became clear that they were toxic as well and not true friends. I never felt guilt but I was angry and felt betrayed. My life is calm and drama free now. I can’t imagine allowing any of them in back into my life.

13.

My whole life has been watching family members drop out of my life or me dropping them out of my life. And it’s always revolved around addiction/manipulation that I just won’t deal with. People are people, blood or not. They are in no way shape or form entitled to be included in your life if all they do is bring a toxic relationship to the table.

Written by Alex Cogen

Alex is a New Yorker currently living in Austin. She loves cats, grass, and latex but unfortunately is allergic to all 3. She makes mom and dad jokes more than she cares to admit (jk she'll admit it loud and proud). She isn't as funny as she thinks she is. She is the founder of thelazygurl.com.