Posted on: Aug 08 2017

These 19 Guys Confess Why They Love Munching Carpet


Image via Giphy

For some dudes, eating pussy can be equated to having the most delicious, decadent, and satisfying meal ever, but without the carbs. This ain’t your mom’s home-cooked food (oh god I hope not), nor is it that trendy, overpriced brunch spot that serves the best avocado toast in town — because, like, millennials. No — eating out a woman’s nether regions is a delicacy that one can never fill up on, especially if you’re like one of these 19 carpet-munching connoisseurs.

I don’t know if you’ve ever had a woman’s clit in your mouth, but there’s a certain power, a certain heart pounding pleasure that comes (and cums) from making her writhe and moan and shake. When you take a woman’s vagina in your mouth, you’re letting her show the most vulnerable part of herself, so you better lap that sh*t up with enthusiasm and gusto.

And for all my fellows who say they hate eating a girl out — well — I hope you don’t enjoy blow jobs because oral sex is definitely a two-way street. If a woman is healthy and takes care of her bits, there shouldn’t be any crazy smells or substances coming from down there, so take it from these bros and take that pussy for a little tongue ride. You’ll know she’s enjoying it when she starts squeezing your head to an inch of its life in between her thighs while pulling on your hair and trembling all over. Just do it.

These 19 guys are obsessed with munching carpet for these titillating reasons:


When she orgasms so bad she closes her legs and almost smothers you to death in a vagina-fluid filled gas mask.


Her reactions. Watching and feeling her getting turned on is the single best thing about it. Bonus points if she clutches my head between her legs.


The smell and how wet she is. It’s obvious if I’m turned on but if the first time you’re touching her pussy is when you’re going down on her, there’s nothing like feeling, licking, and smelling how wet she is. Also I love when you lick the right spot and her body shakes a little. Giving a girl oral is one of my favorite things to do.


That back arch. Mmmmmmmm.