entertainment

Things The Opposite Sex Just Doesn’t Understand

17.

(Guy here) I’m not a pedophile when I go to the park and sit on the bench while watching the playground. I’m making sure my son doesn’t get hurt.

18.

We don’t get hints. Stop dropping them. While I’m gay anyway, every other man on the planet will thank me for saying this.

19.

I’m a woman and I love sex. My sex drive is actually normally a fair bit higher than most men’s, and I find that despite men saying that they’d love that, they find it emasculating. Girls love sex too!

20.

Period cramps are nothing like a cramp you’d get in your leg after working out. It feels like someone tied your guts in a knot, put them in a trash compactor and set them on fire. It’s like taking the feeling like you’re about to have shotgun diarrhea and putting it in the front instead of the back. Except it doesn’t go away after you shit. We aren’t being sissies when we whine about the pain. Literally, the inside of one of our internal organs is prying itself away and exiting our bodies. IT HURTS. It’s one of the reasons many of us get a little cranky every four weeks.

Written by Alex Cogen

Alex is a New Yorker currently living in Austin. She loves cats, grass, and latex but unfortunately is allergic to all 3. She makes mom and dad jokes more than she cares to admit (jk she'll admit it loud and proud). She isn't as funny as she thinks she is. She is the founder of thelazygurl.com.