7. A much better use for your $1,000 computer tower

Well my computer doesn’t work but, hey, I saved the $2 it would cost to buy an actual cheese grater so I’m practically Bill Fucking Gates.
8. Don’t try this at home – these two are trained professional dumbasses

Don’t worry, Ted’s there for support.
9. Water bottle flip-flops
And you thought the sound regular flip flops make was annoying.