7. Clearly, close doesn’t count.
He tried spanking me. Clearly he's never done that. He mainly just hit my side fat #sexfail
— The CannaSwift? (@forgetktkeller) July 10, 2012
8. Time to change the sheets.
Accidentally poured coconut oil all over my entire body trying to act sexy for sex. #blooper #sexfail #dork
— Dana DeArmond (@danadearmond) April 20, 2014
9. Savage.
I climb into bed, sidle up behind my husband, spoon & squeeze him & kiss his neck & he says…
"You had garlic today." #sexfail— LiftNLoad (@LiftNLoad) March 2, 2012
10. Because there are never enough dragons.
Sex is like Game of Thrones. I'm confused, I don't know anyone's name, the nudity's better in theory, not enough dragons, never long enough.
— (((R.M. Weiner))) (@rmfnord) May 4, 2015