19 Confessions From Guys Who Got Hard At The Wrong Time

9.

I was at a funeral for my great grandmother. Between the service and burial boooiiinngg. Boner. I was 14 at the time and hadn’t learned about the thigh clench or waistband tuck. So horrified, I asked my mom what to do because she was the only other person in the car. And that kids, is when I learned the waistband method.

10.

Wake up in the morning all the time with it poking out of my underwear. My whole family has seen it and so has my roommate, multiple times.

11.

I had to brief an upcoming event at work to an audience of 40ish people. I’m in the Navy and was wearing my “whites.” I typically don’t wear boxers in the whites because you can see right through them. In the front row was a really smoking hot red head, easy 10. About half way through the brief she changes legs that are crossed and I happened to glance past, it was an insta boner. Since I was hanging down it immediately pitched a tent. I was on stage and there were multiple admirals in the audience. Afterwards my boss took me aside and said next time stand behind the podium. I was so shocked that didn’t even cross my mind.

12.

My best friend in high school got called up in front of the class while he was fully torqued. He said he couldn’t right then and the teacher said he had to. He called the teacher over and whispered to her, “I have a boner.” She immediately called on another student.

Written by Laura McNairy

Laura is a freelance writer for TFLN. She likes to write about what she knows best — dating, sex, and being awkward, but usually in the opposite order. She is the Assistant Editor and videographer for Peach Fuzz, a sex-positive nudie magazine in ATX.