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21 Doctors Confess The Dumbest Things They Have Ever Heard From A Patient

13.

That a child can not have inherited any genetic traits from someone the mother has previously been with. Only one man is the biological father.

14.

My wife and I were trying to get pregnant, and due to possible complications we were talking to a obstetrician. Towards the end of the visit, he tells us, in all seriousness, “Just so you guys know, you have to stop using condoms if you want to get pregnant.” We just stare at him a bit, and say, uh, obviously? And he just shakes his head and says “You’d be surprised; there’s been a few couples that really didn’t realize that.”

15.

You’re still sexually active even if you are just on the bottom every time.

16.

Vet here… Dead bodies decompose! If you leave your dead dog I euthanized in the back of your car on the hottest day of the year, don’t come crying to me when its belly fills with putrefying gases and bursts. Demanding I cover the costs of reupholstering your car might be considered a little rude as well.

Written by Alex Cogen

Alex is a New Yorker currently living in Austin. She loves cats, grass, and latex but unfortunately is allergic to all 3. She makes mom and dad jokes more than she cares to admit (jk she'll admit it loud and proud). She isn't as funny as she thinks she is. She is the founder of thelazygurl.com.