Getting hit on is either one of the most confidence-boosting and exhilarating experiences OR a moment of sheer panic, disgust, and annoyance. I mean, who wants to get hit on at the hospital while you’re waiting for your dad to get out of his colonoscopy?
Positive courtship experiences all depend on a few key factors — 1) are you in a safe, appropriate setting? 2) Have you been reciprocating the cheeky eye contact and smiling back? 3) And does the person hitting on you look like Ryan Gosling, Idris Elba, or Javier Bardem? If you can answer yes to all three questions, then getting hit on is the best f*cking thing ever!
Sadly, that’s not how the dating world works and creepers gonna mother f*cking creep. Like dude — don’t bring up how I look like your sister and definitely don’t get one one knee and recite a poorly written soliloquy about your penchant for anal.
So the next time you’re at the bar or club or grocery store or bus stop and that weird guy asks if you want to have lunch sometime in a cemetery — RUN! Sure, sh*t can get weird when trying to break the ice, but you need to know how and when to dip as to not get cornered in a downward spiral of awkward small talk and hints that can’t be taken.
