21 Things People Did During Sex Without Warning

Image via Imgur
Image via Imgur

If you’re doing sex the best way, then it’s hot, heavy, and just a major clusterf*ck. There are limbs and fluids everywhere, it’s like a freaking battlefield. Sound great right?

OF COURSE IT SOUNDS GREAT. And you know what else is great in the bedroom? Surprises. Someone throws you onto a bed without warning, or you get pushed up against the wall and they f*ck the shit out of you. Ahh, that sounds so nice.

Well, when it comes to the unexpected in sex, it isn’t always awesome. Sometimes the surprises are hella nasty or just extremely degrading and f*cked up. No one likes someone shitting the bed or shoving their parts into holes not previously discussed.

The following 21 people experienced or did things during sex with zero warning. Whether those things were good or bad depends on the situation, but regardless, these people didn’t see this sh*t cuming.

These 21 people did things during sex without warning:


1.

First time with a new partner. She was giving me pretty good head and sans warning sucked my nuts (both of them) into her mouth a little too forcefully. I bucked and she got a swift knee to the stomach, which caused her head to snap back-balls still in mouth. They stretched as far as they could and then shot out of her mouth accompanied by the noise made when you open a pringles can. Laughs were had , my jewels were sore. We kept going.

2.

A girl started choking me as I was about to cum. No one ever did that to me before and the thought never crossed my mind to let someone try it. Turned out to be one of the best orgasms I ever had.

3.

I was on top and we were going at it on the bottom bed of one of those metal bunk beds. He reached up and grabbed the bottom of the top bunk and then hooked his feet through the slats so he was hanging from the top bunk like a sloth and I was still on top of him. Dude was wiry but freakishly strong.

4.

A guy who I had been dating for a week told me to lay down on my stomach, in my bra and underwear, to give me a warm oil back massage. We hadn’t slept together yet, but we had messed around so I was comfortable with that. He was rubbing my lower back and butt cheeks and thighs. Suddenly, there was a warm oily dick all the way up my butthole. No warning, no preparation. I was sore for three days and never spoke to him again.

Written by Alex Cogen

Alex is a New Yorker currently living in Austin. She loves cats, grass, and latex but unfortunately is allergic to all 3. She makes mom and dad jokes more than she cares to admit (jk she'll admit it loud and proud). She isn't as funny as she thinks she is. She is the founder of thelazygurl.com.