humor

23 Bosses Confess The Craziest Thing They’ve Seen An Employee Do

21.

We had a guy that would vanish in the middle of the day for roughly 3-4 hours, then return at the end of the day. Come to find out he would go home during that time, play with his dogs, smoke weed and then come back to work. When we had to sit him down and explain he couldn’t just leave, he totally flipped out and told us all to “go f ourselves and to f-ing fire him.” He got a warning, and still works here, and HR still does nothing when he disappears.

22.

I had an employee call and tell me her mother died. Well, I got an anonymous phone call from someone telling me she was lying so I called the number I had on file to send my regards and I get an address to send flowers. In the meantime the office had collected an envelope of money to help with the costs of the funeral and missing work. When I called, the mother answered and was shocked to find out her daughter used her death as an excuse to go to Vegas for the weekend. When she returned I help a big meeting with everyone in the office and presented her with the envelope of money and flowers, she took it and faked cried. I called her into my office to reveal that I knew and fired her and took the envelope back. She said she “don’t give a fuck” and left.

23.

Caught my boss getting a BJ from one of the sales women. She didn’t realize her heels were visible from the 3″ gap between the floor and front panel on his desk. I said “Nice shoes, Vickie!” Turned around, and walked out.

Written by Laura McNairy

Laura is a freelance writer for TFLN. She likes to write about what she knows best — dating, sex, and being awkward, but usually in the opposite order. She is the Assistant Editor and videographer for Peach Fuzz, a sex-positive nudie magazine in ATX.