dating

23 Couples Tried Porno Sex Moves and It Didn’t End Well

13.

I was once trying to do some rough play with my current SO. Things heated up in the living room and escalated to me picking her up and carrying her to my bedroom. Once there, in an attempt to man handle her and show off strength, I chunked her onto the bed like a brut which banged the fuck out of her tail bone and resulted in her crying for 10 minutes. The sex did not continue.

14.

We were on the bed and I tried to pick her up and f*ck her against the wall (while standing on the bed). I didn’t know her bed was on wheels. Bed slides out and we go into the gap, my forehead breaks her nose and splits her lip.

15.

I c*ck slapped a girls lips and she started laughing. I don’t know how to take that.

16.

First time we did anal we were drunk, it was fun, & I remember saying “you’re like my own personal pornstar!” A few weeks in, we we’re at it again & she said “You can do anything you want.” I thought quickly about how all the porn I’d seen recently had lots of “ass eating” & so I made an attempt. I guess she had done a number 2, & there was for sure a bit of that flavor. I thought that was normal, & I powered on. She seemed to be into it, but kept clenching her cheeks. At one point I was licking the booty hole & rubbing the clit & I felt like a champ. Then this happened quickly. She says “wait stop stop stop” & I pull up and say “what’s wrong?” & then the nastiest fart I’ve ever heard came out of her rear end.

Written by Alex Cogen

Alex is a New Yorker currently living in Austin. She loves cats, grass, and latex but unfortunately is allergic to all 3. She makes mom and dad jokes more than she cares to admit (jk she'll admit it loud and proud). She isn't as funny as she thinks she is. She is the founder of thelazygurl.com.