16. Here’s another phone sex tale of several clients, proving that phone sex operators may, indeed, actually have the weirdest stories. (via)
I did phone sex for a couple of months back in 2004. I found it to be a depressing job because a) the pay sucks and b) you get some sickos. Unlike others in this thread, we were allowed to hang up on people who crossed certain lines (underage, incest, rape).
I had several memorable callers. One was a guy who claimed to be about 20 and in college, and he did most of the talking. He wanted me to just “breathe heavy”. So for 20 minutes he’s doing the most boring dirty talk I’ve ever heard (“I’m licking you up…and down…and up…now down…and up…”) and I’m sitting there panting and hoping he gets it over with already. By the time he finally finishes, I’m nearly hyperventilating, and was too lightheaded to take another call for an hour.
There was the redneck with a strong Southern accent who really liked ass to mouth play. So he’d want me to put my finger in his butt to play with his prostate and then suck on my fingers. Whenever I described something he liked, he’d say, “Oohhhhh, yerrr kinkyyyyyyy,” in this weirdly creepy way. He must have liked what I did because he’d call back often.
There was a Scottish guy who would call while his friends and roommates were in the apartment and talk to me like I was his girlfriend. When they left to go somewhere, he’d hang up. I’m pretty sure they had to know his girlfriend was imaginary…
…My favorite caller by far was one who wanted a very specific scenario. The operator, before connecting us, would tell me that he wanted to talk to a “she-male” (his words, not mine) who was flamingly gay and had very large breasts. I didn’t really know what to do the first time, so I just put on my best drag queen voice and threw in a lot of, “Oh, HONEY” and that sort of thing. He loved it. He had a really strong Boston accent and kept saying, “I love the quee-ahs!!” He was a regular caller, and I really started to understand why some called the job “phone actress.”
Finally, there was a guy who called himself “Super Leg Man” and I liked talking to him because all he wanted me to do was talk about how I worked out on the stairmaster all the time and tell him how muscular my legs were. That’s all he wanted for 20 minutes at a time. I dug it because it was so nonsexual for me and his long calls upped my call time average (which determined my pay rate).
Also, for some reason, about 75% of guys choose to call themselves Steve. No idea why.
17. Cam show workers, however, clearly have the most fun. (via)
Camgirl here, I hope that counts!
I have a guy that comes in every few months and wants to have a pretend “gunfight” with me. Like, we face off, draw our “weapons”, and “shoot” each other. He is super specific with the wording he wants me to use, and it’s such an easy show.
When asked how the gunfights worked, she elaborated:
Haha we just point our fingers at each other and make pew pew sounds.
Someone (correctly) commented that this sounded like a blast:
It is! Seriously, the more creative the fantasy, the more fun. I try to inject some humour whenever I can. I had a Boss/Secretary fantasy the other day, and I just started injecting office buzzwords. Like…”I want to be a real team player, sir.” and “Let’s get Dave in here for a team building exercise.”
18. This is equal parts fun and grossly informative. Or infartmative, if that’s what you’re into. (via)
Am a camgirl….Only saw this guy once so maybe he didn’t like my art skills, who knows. He asked me to draw on crazy eyebrows, like stick straight pointed upwards ‘angry’ brows so I did. Then I needed a clown scowl. That was enough for the face so then he had me draw fangs on my nipples. Vampire tits haha. And then lastly, a face for my pussy. Complete with eyes, a nose, and mouth. We both had a lot of fun, I could see him and I don’t think he was jerking it, just laughing hysterically with me. Wish he’d come back! Recently had a different guy ask me to just fart, like continuously. He didn’t know that for fart porn vids the girls literally pump their asses with air. Yeah that wasn’t going to happen…
19. Some people have kinks, this guy just liked crooks (crook is also a word for the bend your arm makes at the elbow). (via)
I used to waitress at a strip club. I remember one dude came in and asked girls to let him rub their elbows. …One girl did. She kinda thought it was funny. He didn’t like my elbows though. He was picky haha.
20. There is a really surprising number of very similar, and in some cases much more severe, fetishes like this one. (via)
Guy used to come see me every week and pay me to kick him in the balls. HARD. Repeatedly for 5-10 minutes. And I usually wore boots. He obviously loved it. He would flinch a bit, but usually asked me to kick him harder. I was apprehensive the first few times, but quickly learned that he seriously wanted me to kick him as hard as I could. If I had a stressful week dealing with assholes I would look forward to him visiting so I could take out some aggression.
