As a human, there are some things in life (CREEPY CRAWLIES) that get under our skin — morbid facts, scary sea creatures, and torture statistics — just to name a few. Yes, we are creeped the F out, but we’re weird in the way that we just HAVE to click on the video that shows thousands of Daddy Long Leg spiders overtaking a ceiling corner. We’re eerily drawn to creepy sh*t that makes us feel uncomfortable because we’re disgusting and want to sabotage our happy lives any chance we get!
Sometimes, though, we come across pieces of information that are so disgusting, so unbelievable, that we have keep ourselves from gagging. Like, did I really need to know that there are microscopic mites living on my eyelashes at all times? I sure as hell regret not taking off my makeup before falling asleep last night, that’s for sure.
I truly hope that you’re not trying to fall asleep anytime soon because your dreams are about to be filled with hoards of tarantulas, stone babies, guillotines, and cannibalistic worms. BRB — buying a thousand Redbulls and watching The Great British Baking Show to ease my ailing mind.