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27 Examples That Prove Children Really Are Evil

5.

When I was in 7th grade I said “Your mother sucks c*cks in hell” to a kid who was talking shit to me. It had completely slipped my mind that the dude’s mother died a couple years prior.

6.

When I was like 3-4, I saw these glasses with really small frames and I said “These glasses are for Chinese people.” Loud as fuck in a dollar store and everyone gave me this brief stare and my mom or dad smacked me I forgot. I had no idea what the fuck I was saying but I used to always think aloud. But that moment I will never forget.

7.

“You should get a nose job, you look like a jew.” -My 8 y/o sister to me.

8.

“Why is she so fat?” – My 3 year old niece referring to the cash register lady.

9.

When I was in 1st/2nd grade this diabetic kid said to me that nobody cares about me, so I said nobody cares about him either but everyone freaked out on me because he was diabetic. F*ck you Michael.

Written by Alex Cogen

Alex is a New Yorker currently living in Austin. She loves cats, grass, and latex but unfortunately is allergic to all 3. She makes mom and dad jokes more than she cares to admit (jk she'll admit it loud and proud). She isn't as funny as she thinks she is. She is the founder of thelazygurl.com.