16. No personal effects on the table, please.
Cell phones are the worst, for obvious reasons. But encroaching on someone else’s elbow space because you can’t bear to put your sunglasses, handbag, or keys out of sight? Also a hard no.
17. No texting. No email. No calls… No phones!!!
If you were paying attention to the last one (or to the look on your dining companions’ faces) you’d know this.
But if you were too busy looking up movie times, perusing sports stats, or worse, sending selfies on Snapchat ON YOUR FREAKING CELL PHONE, we’ll say it again. If you’re looking at a screen, you can’t sit with us.
18. Don’t judge.
This goes for dietary preferences and drinking alike. It’s cool if you’re pregnant, in AA, or just not that into drinking. Then don’t drink. Similarly, if you’re vegan, vegetarian, or gluten free, don’t order the steak/pasta/whatever it is that doesn’t jive for you.
But please don’t make it weird if I do choose to partake. And for the love of god don’t make me listen to a 20 minute speech about why your life choices are better than mine.
