We all have that one friend who can’t get through a single conversation without saying something dirty. Anything and everything that can be made inappropriate will be made inappropriate. While we can easily scoff at them and write it off as immaturity, we know deep down that our lives would be extremely boring without the constant sexual innuendos.
This holiday season, get that dirty-minded friend a gift they really want like one of these unbelievably crude products. Tbh, you might end up keeping some of them for yourself.
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1. This 2019 calendar filled with nothing but pooping pooches.
New month, new poop.
Get it on Amazon
2. Some rather nutty rear bike lights.
Hopefully the only blue balls they’ll have.
Get it on Amazon
3. This bottle opener that’s just a little too excited to see you.
Always ready to party.
Get it on Amazon
4. This book of images no one should ever masturbate to.
Never ever.
Get it on Amazon
5. Celebrate their favorite word with this tasty coffee mug.
Seriously though, can we please come up with another word to describe cake?
Get it on Amazon
6. This booby paperweight that’s as functional as it is hilarious.
Only for your breast friend.
Get it on Amazon
7. A reindeer mankini that’ll seriously alter anyone’s feelings about Rudolph.
Gives red nose a whole new meaning.
Get it on Amazon
8. Just a pair of brass balls because everyone needs them.
Alas! The bronze testicles.
Get it on Amazon
9. This cookbook that’ll teach you all of the new ways to eat cock.
Who knew there were so many?
Get it on Amazon
10. A naughty card game that every holiday party needs.
Especially if The Office is on.
Get it on Amazon