Sitting on the curb looking a hot mess waiting for my uber when the guy I just hooked up with strolled by with his friend to go play an early game of tennis. 6.
Not me. But one morning in my city, the day after Halloween, I saw a girl walking down an alley with someone who had to be her mom. I know it was a walk of shame because she had a witch outfit on with 6 inch heels, wobbling around on a brick road. The mom was a shorter, conservatively dressed, annoyed looking mama, helping her balance. A short walk of shame to a minivan ride of shame. Brutal! 7.
I couldn’t find my shirt and he wouldn’t give me one so I rode the subway home in a bra and my jeans. Probably one of the worst moments of my life. 8.
I bumped into a girl & she spilled jungle juice on my white t shirt. Later went home with a girl & as she pulled down my shorts she ripped them clear down the front. I’m not taking like a small rip but one that basically ripped the fly in half & almost tore the pant leg clean off. Fast forward to the next morning. I get up start to say my goodbyes and get dressed. I start putting on my clothes. The white T with an ominous red stain down the front, the torn shorts. I’m a mess, I look like a rape victim or a rapist take your pick and I was still a little drunk. So I leave her apartment and realize I am on the opposite side of campus. I start on my walk of shame. Got lots of looks, some questions, was asked if I needed help & the occasional high five.
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