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10+ Tips For Women Who Really Want To, Uh, Get In Touch With Themselves

Physical pleasure is a wonderful thing to share with another person, but sometimes you want be the center of your own attention. Many think they have already perfected their personal technique for getting off. You know exactly what shower head setting to turn to in your time of need. However, life is long, if you’re lucky. Why not experiment? Expand your horizons? Rocket off into the unknown?

Maybe the old ways you play with yourself just aren’t doing it for you anymore or you’re not quite there. Whether you need to be revitalized, redirected, and reminded that there’s yet more to feel, here’s a list of ways to make that special touch extra special. You’ve deserve the very best—from you.

12. Find Your G-Spot

It sounds made up, and if you’ve been searching in vain, it probably feels made up. Vaginas are great, because they have so much sensitivity and available pleasure all along the outside. Why delver deeper if you don’t have to? Because it can get even better. You can use a vibrator designed to hit that spot in your vaginal canal, or go low-tech with two fingers. It’s about three inches in on the upper wall, and it gets swollen when you’re aroused. Which, hopefully you are.

11. Touch Your Whole Body

You would be pissed if your lover just grabbed your genitals and considered their work done. Give yourself the same all over treatment. Your skin is sensitive and enjoys being stroked as much as your clitoris does. Essentially, treat yourself to some foreplay.

10. Hold Your Legs Together

Squeezing your legs together as you climax will add an extra burst of general pressure that makes the climax more intense without pressing directly on your most sensitive areas.

9. Try Different Fantasies

Most arousal doesn’t come from touch, but from our imagination. Your brain will get you there faster, and if you’ve been focusing one fantasy for too long, it might be time to switch things up. Get creative. No one is watching—unless it’s hot to imagine someone is? Hmm…

8. Make It An Occasion

Take yourself on a date. Maybe that seems silly, but masturbation doesn’t have to be rushed or perfunctory. Light a candle, draw a bath, watch your favorite episode of Outlander. You’re kind of romancing yourself, getting in the mood, and the more stimulated your sense are, the more intense the rewards.

7. Try A Sex Toy

There are way more toys out there than the standard bachelorette ding-dong that gets waved around after the bride has had one too many tequila shots. Find your local sex shop and look around. There are more phallic offerings, but there are also fingertip sized vibrators that you can wear like a ring. Consider the possibilities.

6. Lube Up

If you used lubricant with a partner and have a brand you know works well with your body, you can also use it alone. Or with a toy. Or alone with a toy. Have you heard they make lubes that heats up now? Check it out.

5. Temperature Is Key

Speaking of which, when was the last time you adjusted the temperature on your shower head? Heat and cold are strong stimulants for the skin. Take it slow, but also take it hot and cold.

4. Books Can Be Porn

Women are generally considered more verbal, so that might be part of why romance novels are so popular. They’re more stimulating to our fantasies than watching porn—which is often directed for the male gaze. Read an erotic story and see if that’s the smut you’ve been missing.

3. Switch Positions

You’ve probably noticed that much of this advice is similar to what you would hear about having sex with another person, and the theme continues. Change your positions: you don’t have to just do it on your back. Lay on your front, lean against a wall, do it in a chair. Try it all around the house!