Relationships

These Sex Shop Employees Spilled The Tea About Their Craziest Customers (25 Stories)

21.

I worked at a sex shop from 19-21 and it was interesting to say the least. We were open till midnight on the weekends and about 15 mins before closing this normal looking woman in a track suit comes in. She’s holding a leash with a diaper clad man on the end. What shocked me more than anything was the dude had sandals with socks on. I told the couple they had to leave because pant were required in order to shop. Guy turns beet red (I’m thinking getting humiliated is his thing) the lady smirks and off they go. I had so much fun at that job.

22.

Not me, but my girlfriend’s story. A customer came in and she said she never had an orgasm and she was told that some women just never have an orgasm. She didn’t buy anything besides condoms and then left. 2 days later she comes back in with her boyfriend. The boyfriend is in a big huff yelling, “TELL HER THAT SOME WOMEN JUST DON’T HAVE ORGASMS!” As he was throwing stuff around the room and talking about how his manhood was being insulted and how he was gonna show everyone in the shop how big he is. After he finally left, he peed all over my girlfriend’s car.

23.

I worked at multiple sex toy stores. One day a 19 year old comes in with his girlfriend and is immediately an asshole to me. He was making rude comments to me after each question I answered for him. Finally, he asked me what they should do to spice things up in the bedroom. I walked him over to the strap-ons and told him that he should get fucked. Sadly they did not buy a strap-on that evening.

24.

A friend of mine used to work at one of those stores with a “spank shed” and he tells a great story about a guy who sneaked in a huge piece of uncut bacon and fucked it in the porn booth. There was another guy who took his clothes off and harassed other customers in nothing but a cowboy hat and tube socks, he was also covered in lube.

25.

A guy came in and got change for one of the jack-sheds. These booths were in the back of the building through a doorway. A couple then came in and they were walking around browsing things, talking etc. They were near the door that led to the jack-sheds when that guy in the booth had an orgasm and screamed so loudly the guy in the couple jumped, but the girl screamed and fell to the floor. She then got up, humiliated and left. I could see the wet spot on the front of her jeans. The dude had came so loudly he caused a girl to pee her pants in terror.

Written by Laura McNairy

Laura is a freelance writer for TFLN. She likes to write about what she knows best — dating, sex, and being awkward, but usually in the opposite order. She is the Assistant Editor and videographer for Peach Fuzz, a sex-positive nudie magazine in ATX.