These 19 People Are The Worst Wingmen Imaginable

Being asked to be a wingman is a true honor. Your friend respects you enough to entrust you with helping them get laid. Really, it’s the single-persons equivalent of being asked to be a best man or maid of honor.

So if you’re asked to be a wingman (or wingwoman), take that job seriously. Try and earn yourself the title of best wingman alive, and get your friend laid as much as you can.

And if you offer to be a wingman, and then sh*t the bed, then you suck so hard. You’re a failure as a friend. If you are aware that you’d be a shitty wingman, how about just not offering?

But if you’re planning on being a wingman for the first time, there is some stuff you should know. You really just need to know what not to do. Basically, don’t do the following: take the hot person for yourself, tell people embarrassing things about your friend, or drink so much that you render yourself useless.

So good luck to you future wingmen out there. You is kind, you is smart, you is important. And for those of you that have failed before, learn from your mistakes and the mistakes of others.

These 19 people are the worst wingmen to ever walk the earth:





Written by Alex Cogen

Alex is a New Yorker currently living in Austin. She loves cats, grass, and latex but unfortunately is allergic to all 3. She makes mom and dad jokes more than she cares to admit (jk she'll admit it loud and proud). She isn't as funny as she thinks she is. She is the founder of