These 21 Sneaky Geniuses Used Food To Get Themselves Laid

All I want in life is to eat sushi off of someone and then bang till I hurt all over. Is that too much to ask?

Does anyone else out there think that that sounds like #lifegoals? Or do you have another dream food-f*cking pairing in mind? Pizza and a BJ? Flapjack and anal? No? Well, then there is no pleasing you.

Although eating and doing it is the dream for some, some people just want a little food before or after going to pound town. And some people have acknowledged that food is a great bartering tool to use to get laid. And hey, boning someone is also a great way to get food (we all have our priorities).

Both “would you like to get Chinese food and go back to my place and bone” and “damn that sex was good, now let’s eat some pizza” sound like sentences I wouldn’t mind hearing. Don’t care about the order, mama just wants her D with some sauce on the side.

So if you want your cunnilingus with a side of fries, take a cue from these 21 people:





Written by Alex Cogen

Alex is a New Yorker currently living in Austin. She loves cats, grass, and latex but unfortunately is allergic to all 3. She makes mom and dad jokes more than she cares to admit (jk she'll admit it loud and proud). She isn't as funny as she thinks she is. She is the founder of