This is How Alcohol Should Really Be Labeled

13. Makers Mark: whiskey that makes you feel like a man, until it doesn’t.

2ed33011fc705df49f4259edc7510af0

When you reach for too much of this, you really are your own worst enemy.

 

14. Bud Light: warm piss with a touch of nostalgia.

27fdd52982971ee329d61b62a92beb77

Take note of those air quotes, friends.

 

15. Trendy Wine: proof that feeling classy isn’t the same thing as being classy (or is it?)

if-wine-bottle-labels-were-honest-3

Because you can only say ‘don’t judge me’ and ‘don’t touch my personal bottle’ with your eyes so many times.

 

Images via Total Frat Move and Total Sorority Move.

Written by Mary McCaw

Mary is a freelance writer and editor. She's based in San Francisco, but lately, home is wherever her suitcase is. If you really are what you eat, she is at least 50% pizza.