entertainment

23 People Confess The Trashiest Thing They’ve Seen In Person

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Usually I’m a live and let live kind of millennial, but when I’m strolling down the road with my morning coffee and witness a prostitute giving a handy to her John on a park bench in broad daylight for a little bit of crack, I have to wonder — how did we get to this point in America? And for f*ck’s sake, at least use a blanket or something.

To be trashy is to not give a single f*ck. I mean, I applaud people who march to the beat of their own drummer and who don’t mind people rolling their eyes, scoffing, and shielding their children’s eyes whenever they give the ole shock and awe. But when a mom is sharing her cigarette with her 11 year old daughter, or that man is pissing himself in the front row at a metal concert — it’s time to pour one out for society. RIP our collective dignity.

You know we’ve gotten to a bad place when more people watch Duck Dynasty than vote, when more people celebrate the cast of Jersey Shore than volunteer, and when more people pride themselves on being gross, bigoted, confederates than actually giving a f*ck about those less fortunate. It’s funny to gawk and stare and laugh at trashy reality TV, but when reality TV becomes the basis for how most people want to live their lives — it’s time to shut that sh*t down. I’m looking at you, Real Housewives!

These 23 people confess the single trashiest thing they’ve ever witnessed:

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I once witnessed an older redneck man bringing his teenage daughter to the “family planning” aisle at Wal-Mart. I was next to them picking out condoms, and he tells her to pick out a “good” pregnancy test. The daughter was flustered and the dad was obviously upset. Seems like a somewhat likely scenario until I start to catch things they’re saying to each other in hushed voices. Basically, dad had to explain the difference between “step-brother” and “half-brother” to the daughter and why getting knocked up by a half-brother is not necessarily a genetically responsible thing to do.

3.

I had an elderly customer who always was super kind and friendly almost like a grandmother in a way. Well one day she comes into my work and decides to run up to hug me. Before I knew what happened next I found myself back at my work station with an XL set of worn granny panties in my back pocket. Still gives me shivers down my back to this day.

4.

An 30 year old woman wearing those tracksuits with “Juicy” written across her bottom, walking with her daughter who looked 14 and was dressed like she was 25. I’m talking high heels, overdone makeup and leopard print pants. So the daughter winked and was flirting with one of the workers and the mum stops her, tells her to piss off and grab some milk, whilst she then started to flirt with the worker herself.

Written by Laura McNairy

Laura is a freelance writer for TFLN. She likes to write about what she knows best — dating, sex, and being awkward, but usually in the opposite order. She is the Assistant Editor and videographer for Peach Fuzz, a sex-positive nudie magazine in ATX.