Alex is a New Yorker currently living in Austin. She loves cats, grass, and latex but unfortunately is allergic to all 3. She makes mom and dad jokes more than she cares to admit (jk she'll admit it loud and proud). She isn't as funny as she thinks she is. She is the founder of thelazygurl.com.
Eskimo Brother: When two males acknowledge having been intimate with the same female and remain on good terms, the men are now bonded by having shared the same igloo at one time or another. Have you ever banged the sh*t out of someone, only to find that you know people that have given it to them […] More
This one time, at band camp, a nerdy ginger beauty stuck a flute up her p*ssy, and the world as we knew it changed forever. American Pie changed our lives. A flute could be a dildo! An apple pie could be a substitute vagina! Suddenly, the sexual possibilities were endless and the world looked a little bit […] More
Sometimes we get a little out of hand when we drink. We puke our brains out, f*ck gross losers, spend dough we don’t have and say sh*t we really NEVER should have said. It happens, but we survive. Yeah, sure, sometimes your drunken escapades are HILARIOUS and result in the best stories ever that you will […] More
“I did it all for the cookie!” Is what some people say after they give up a lil’ nookie. Isn’t it interesting how prostitution is frowned upon, yet your everyday folk whore themselves out for things all the time? I mean, seriously, can you tell me you never got with someone because they bought you something […] More
Dear Pizza Gods (Italians), THANK YOU SO MUCH. Seriously.. cheese, tomato sauce, bread.. you guys are f*cking geniuses. I wish I thought of it. Seriously dough (lol, get it?), pizza is so wonderful and it can turn any bad day into a day of warm cheese-filled bliss. Just that word pizza is enough to make a […] More
WHERE DOES ALL OUR MONEY GO?!? Are you also just living paycheck to paycheck, tryin’ to hustle your way into a little extra dough? Sometimes mama just needs a little cash to help get her by. You have to put food in dat belly and f*ck up that liver with booze. Also, paying bills and sh*t […] More
Some people just age better than others. There are the older people that kind of stop trying and let themselves go, and then there are the adults that work hella hard to stay fit AF and keep up their sexy appearance. This is how you get MILFs. Not only are these mothers super fine, but […] More
“Ass or titties?” is possibly one of the most annoying questions on the planet. Why you gotta pick between them? ‘Cause, let’s be honest, they are both just so wonderful. But apparently some people tend to have a preference for one or the other, and I guess I can’t judge them for that. Really, anything […] More
There’s nothing quite like humping your brains out. But want to add a little extra adrenalin to your boning? Well, how about taking your boo bear out and about and porkin’ that mofo in the streets? We’ve all heard of the holy grail of public fornication: the mile high club. It is a sex act all […] More
Traveling is just the best. You are experiencing places you always imagined, and are far away from the stresses of your every day life. You also are surrounded by strangers, so you can let loose and get a little crazy without the fear of your promiscuity and sloppiness reaching home. It’s the time to bang people with […] More
Sometimes it really helps to scroll through reviews before purchasing or renting something. But every once in a while you stumble across a review and are either taken aback by how dumb someone is, or find the best unknown comedian of our generation. Take Amazon movie reviews for example. You can find some helpful reviews […] More
Celebrity encounters usually go as follows: “Hey, can I take a photo?” “Sure.” “Thanks.” It’s really riveting stuff. But every once in a while you meet a celeb and the interaction surpasses all of your expectations. You smoke weed with Childish Gambino or Bon Jovi farts in your face. See, those are the kinds of […] More
