People Are Sharing The Dumbest Excuses Their SOs Gave For Cheating And, Just, Wow

Cheaters always eventually get caught, or so several thousand graphic Pinterest quotes will have us believe. It's difficult to spend so much time living a lie without arousing suspicion, and even more difficult to figure out what to say when the jig is finally up.

A recent thread posed to the AskReddit community by u/Tom1316155555 posited the following question: “What’s the dumbest excuse your girlfriend/boyfriend has used for cheating on you?” and the responses were…varied. They spanned the gamut of emotion, from infuriating, to laughably untrue, to just plain rude and sad. Read on:


She said “My mom cheated on my dad when they first started dating.”



“It's not really cheating because I don't love you anymore. I just think of you as a really good friend.”

8 years together, engaged to be married



I got one! When confronted she just said ‘Well his d*ck was 30 cm, I just couldn't resist touching it'. I really couldn't think of an answer back then.


(Editor's Note: 30cm = 11.8 inches.)


“I've cheated with everyone I've ever been in a relationship with”

Why would you not tell me that before we got into a relationship??



“We’re in an open relationship!”

Except we weren’t. The day before she asked if I would be open to one and I said let me think about it and we can talk tomorrow. The next day comes around and she said she has to go to a study session with one of her friends when i get home. I found out she was at a d*ck session when she was telling her best friend immediately after.


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“I didn't want him to go to prom alone”. Okay but did you have to f**k him afterwards?



“I was testing you to see if you'd stay loyal even if I cheated.”



‘It's your fault, you drove me to it'

Me: Taking care of our two kids <3y, working full time, bread winner, doing the household chores… so yeah, I was kind of angry/tired all the time

Him: working in ‘music', going to concerts all the time and sleeping in.



Well you knew I loved her, so it's not like it's unexpected… And I owe her some money so I can't not f**k her really.



“I dont understand American culture.” Was a pretty good one.


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