dating

The 21 Strangest Things That Led To Sexy Time

17.

Ex is a cyclist, so he shaves his legs…I would use an epilator to remove the hair on his legs for him (its quite painful) so he had to drink a lot while I was doing it. Well, all the leg touching and him in his undies made us both hot and bothered, so we will have a sex break then I will continue with the torture.

18.

A few years ago, my girlfriend at the time and I were watching TV at my place. She’s drinking soda, and starts hiccuping. We’re talking about hiccup cures, as they were getting progressively worse. I run back to the room under the guise of searching google for suggestions. I call her into the room, and tell her to sit on the edge of the bed, then lay on her back. Before she could ask what I was going to do, I pulled her pants off, and started going down on her. Within a few minutes, hiccups were the last thing on her mind…

19.

I was with my gf buying thai food and subway, and while we were waiting for her food, I asked if I could go to the arcade and shoot some people. She obliged, and I saw they had Time Crisis II, which I’m fairly amazing at. I told her this may take a while, which she saw as cockiness. Halfway through Stage II, no deaths, no lost health, I looked over and she was just giving me that look like “I wish everyone in here was dead so I could ravage you.” I promptly dropped the gun, got her food, and we barely made it to the car in underground parking before we were steaming up the windows.

20.

One of my ex’s used to get hot when I was on conference calls from the home office. I’m a consultant, so I’m usually using heavy jargon, explaining complex technical things, or discussing how I’m going to solve problems or get people the answers they need. So, I’d get off the conference call, she’d walk in, drag me to the bedroom, and we’d romp for an hour or two.

21.

Everytime I’m at his place cooking dinner, he pulls me to the room to show his appreciation before the food is even done! Needless to say I’ve burnt a dish or two.

Written by Alex Cogen

Alex is a New Yorker currently living in Austin. She loves cats, grass, and latex but unfortunately is allergic to all 3. She makes mom and dad jokes more than she cares to admit (jk she'll admit it loud and proud). She isn't as funny as she thinks she is. She is the founder of thelazygurl.com.