Alex is a New Yorker currently living in Austin. She loves cats, grass, and latex but unfortunately is allergic to all 3. She makes mom and dad jokes more than she cares to admit (jk she'll admit it loud and proud). She isn't as funny as she thinks she is. She is the founder of thelazygurl.com.
Got a George W. Bush down there? Need to tame that sucker? Well, why go for the usual shave when you can get a little creative? Some people have taken the opportunity to change their everyday routines, and let their creativity flourish. They turn their food into beautiful creations, and some even do some creative landscaping […] More
Sexting is wonderful. Seriously, if you’ve been part of a hot text exchange, then you probably look back fondly, and maybe even took a screenshot so that you’d always remember that magical moment. But sexting takes some level of skill. You have to know how to gracefully start and finish without being hella awkward or using […] More
BLOODY HELL should be the term used to describe period sex. It is a hellscape comprised of a lonely unfertilized egg. So yeah, combine that with some swimmers and you’ve got yourself a dope party! Seriously, periods suck so much. Sure, ladies are horny AF during their time of the month (and our tits look […] More
Masturbating is the best. That’s ’cause nothing in the world beats the big O and cumming so hard you feel it everywhere. People that masturbate normally do it to things like porn, Victoria’s Secret catalogs, and pictures of their boo or ex-boo (normal, yet really sad). But some weird AF mofos masturbate to the strangest things […] More
Your birthday is the best day of the year. You know why? ‘Cause it’s the one day where it is all about you. Maybe you take advantage of your birthday by asking for gifts and throwing yourself a party. Well, the only birthday party that matters is the party in your pants. This year, spend […] More
Have you ever talked to someone and thought to yourself, “okay, this has to be an act, no one is this stupid.” Well, turns out some people are. Some peeps have the brains of children and still don’t understand things that a 9-year-old would know. For example, you and I both know not to sniff […] More
All I want in life is to eat sushi off of someone and then bang till I hurt all over. Is that too much to ask? Does anyone else out there think that that sounds like #lifegoals? Or do you have another dream food-f*cking pairing in mind? Pizza and a BJ? Flapjack and anal? No? Well, […] More
“Why do they call it Plan B?” ‘CAUSE PLAN A WAS FOR YOU NOT TO CUM INSIDE OF ME. Sometimes, home-boy cums in you and you’re like, “really, dude?” But sometimes, the condom breaks and it’s really no one’s fault. Unfortunately, you still gotta deal with that ish PRONTO. So f*ck plan a, it’s time for […] More
Ever talked your way out of a ticket? Or were you so drunk and hilarious that a cop had no choice but to find your sloppiness entertaining? Perhaps you are just such a charming drunk, that you can befriend a cop and walk away without a hitch. Yeah, none of those things have happened to […] More
We’ve all drunk puked in a garbage can before (DON’T LIE TO ME). Although a toilet is ideal, sometimes you can’t get there fast enough and a garbage can is your next best option. And you know what, garbage cans rule. ‘Cause a garbage can never judges you. A garbage can never says, “stop throwing […] More
In the wise words of founding father, Thomas Paine, “I like the bartender.. oooh if you’re lookin’ for me.” T-Pain, you really know your sh*t. Bartenders are the glue that holds us all together. Without them, it would be a booze free-for-all, and peeps would be gettin’ their stomachs pumped left and right. When your […] More
Are you one of those people that puts half their paycheck in savings, or do you go out and spend that dough ASAP? Maybe you’ve got bills to pay, or maybe you’ve just got a lot of living to do. It’s cool to spend some mullah on drankin’, getting high AF, and providing yourself with […] More
