These 21 People Came Up With Hilarious Excuses For Their Hickies

We’ve all been there – you get a hickey and you need to hide that sucker ASAP. But that scenario likely happened way back in middle school or high school when you were starting to sexually blossom and had to hide all traces from your rents.

And then there are adults hiding hickies. When this happens, it’s usually out of embarrassment or professionalism, ’cause you have a grown-up job and don’t want to be the butt of all those water cooler jokes.

So sure, sometimes you have to hide a hickey for logical reasons. But if you’re hiding a hickey from a significant other, because it came from someone else, then you suck so hard (lol see what I did there?).

Not only are you hiding a hickey from your partner, but you try to lie your ass off and attempt to come up with a believable excuse. But really though, most hickey excuses aren’t believable! So you’re just digging yourself deeper and deeper.

Take a cue from these 21 people. They hilariously tried to lie themselves out of trouble, and came up with laughably ridiculous excuses for their hickies. One way not to make their mistake? How about not acting like a inexperienced teenager and not giving hickies? Or, how about just being faithful to your partner and not being a POS? Yeah, that could work.

These 21 people made pathetic attempts to lie about their hickies:





Written by Alex Cogen

Alex is a New Yorker currently living in Austin. She loves cats, grass, and latex but unfortunately is allergic to all 3. She makes mom and dad jokes more than she cares to admit (jk she'll admit it loud and proud). She isn't as funny as she thinks she is. She is the founder of