Laura is a freelance writer for TFLN. She likes to write about what she knows best — dating, sex, and being awkward, but usually in the opposite order. She is the Assistant Editor and videographer for Peach Fuzz, a sex-positive nudie magazine in ATX.
Sure, private investigators can be hired to follow husbands that wives suspect of cheating, they can try to catch employees who are definitely lying about their injuries for workers compensation, but they can also be hired to stalk your cat to get down to the real, pressing reasons for Precious’ mysterious weight gain. It turns […] More
You knew there was always something slightly off about the boy who grey up down the street from you. He was quiet, would kill ants under a magnifying glass after school for fun, and he’d always throw rocks at cars that drove down your street. You always chalked it up to bad parenting and a […] More
There are little things a person does that end up revealing huge things about their personality. Does this person discreetly pick up random trash that others have carelessly left behind? They probably call their parents weekly and give good head. Did that person just get totally schooled by someone at their own hobby? Did they […] More
There are few things more cringe-inducing than having a bro named Chad serenade you with a poorly played guitar rendition of a sh*tty Bruno Mars song. Oh wait, having that same bro named Chad bombard you with an out-of-nowhere-proposal on the jumbotron at a semi-finals basketball game sucks way, way worse. Dudes, don’t ever make […] More
Ladies — listen up! You know how you think you’re being super cute and fun when you “playfully” punch your dude in the arm after he says something funny? Cut that sh*t out! Your boy bruises like a peach and he doesn’t have the heart to tell you that it really hurts. He’s been rubbing arnica […] More
Asking your parents how they met can be such a gamble. Sure, some were high school sweethearts and have never touched another person’s genitals (okay mom and dad), but some of our parents were the freakiest of freaky freaks. Like, yeah, I know the people that gave me life had/have active sex lives, and I […] More
We’ve all been there — you’ve saved up for months for the perfect getaway, your bags are packed, and you’re ready to hit the road, Jack! Though, after a seven hour flight delay, getting stuck between a screaming baby and a woman who’s clipping her toenails on the flight, you walk out into the beautiful air […] More
Gone are the days of naming your precious children things like David or Sarah or Becky or Chad. No — now millennials are naming their kids Axe and Baelee and Lasagna and Khaleesi. I kid you f*cking not. I love Game of Thrones as much as the next b*tch, but am I going to name my […] More
Finally getting out of a toxic community that you’ve been a part of for months, years, or even your entire life can be one of the most liberating and insightful things to ever happen. Sometimes, it takes getting out of a church or online parenting community or widow’s mourning group to realize just how f*cked […] More
There is a universal truth to everyone’s existence — death. People don’t necessarily like to sit around thinking about death all the time because it’s a major buzz kill (duh), but when we do, we like to think that we’ll be pushing 100, surrounded by all of our friends and family, and passing peacefully in our […] More
There’s no such thing as a perfect family. As much as your neighbors from across the street may seem like they have it all together — there are always cracks and deceptions and deep, dark secrets that dwell below the surface of shiny cars, happy smiles, and over-achieving PTA moms. Maybe it wasn’t until you were […] More
Don’t you wish you had someone to tell you all the things you should be doing in your 20s in order to not be a complete f*cking bum in the future? As I’m creeping toward 30, I find myself second guessing, stressing, and wondering if anyone else feels like their flailing around with a glass […] More
